A guy comes into the Hollywood talent agent's office. "Hey!" he tells the
agent enthusiastically, "you just gotta see my act!"

The agent looks up nonchalantly and asks, "So? What is it you do?"

"I fart the Star Spangled Banner!"

"What? That's sick! Get outta here before I…"

"No! Really! Just give me one chance and I'll show you!"

"Well…, OK. But just once, and make it quick!"

The aspiring performer then drops his pants, removes his underwear, squats,
…and proceeds to move his bowels on the agent's plush, expensive carpet!
The agent is flabbergasted. He jumps up and yells, "What the hell do you
think you're doing?!"

"Relax," the fellow calmly replies. "I just have to clear my throat first…"