A guy goes into the Post Office to interview for a job.

The interviewer asks him "Are you a veteran?"

The guy says "Why yes, in fact I servedvtwo tours in Viet Nam."

"Good," says the interviewer, "That counts in your favor. Do you
have any service related disabilities?"

The guy says, "In fact I am 100% disabled: during a battle an
explosion removed my private parts so they declared me disabled,
it doesn't affect my ability to work, though."

"Sorry to hear about the damage but I have some good news for
you, I can hire you right now! Our working hours are 8:00 to
4:00. Come on in about 10:00 and we'll get you started."

The guy says "If working hours are from 8:00 to 4:00, why do you
want me to come at 10:00?"

"Well, here at the post office we don't do anything but sit
around and scratch our balls for the first two hours. Don't need
you here for that!"

Little Johnny came in from playing one day and asked his mother
if there was a such thing as boy grasshoppers. Johnny's mother
replied, "Of course dear, why do you ask?"

Little Johnny with a puzzled look on his face then asked "Is
there a such thing as girl grasshoppers?"

Knowing a 5 year-old wouldn't understand anything about the birds
and the bees, Johnny's mother replied "no honey."

"OK, just wondering" Johnny said as he smiled and walked out the
door, clapping his hands and yelling "FAGGOTS, FAGGOTS!"